Creative Ways to Distance
I was once of the belief (in much younger years) that our parents handled life with greater ease and joy than children for their knowledge of the world was solid, their career a defined and endless path and their home a formidable fortress that would shelter one’s immediate family for as long as it could stand upright. To this end, I am in absolute awe of those family houses which have withstood the storms of domestic fight and breakdown, whose foundations are like roots engulfing itself in a self-protective shield time and time again. But the reality is that no person - save for those born with a silver spoon - are brought into the world with all the knowledge equipping themselves for absolute, immediate fulfillment.
Expressed more simply, the life journey is that wonderfully challenging and fulfilling path that leads us to spiritual and material accomplishment, and only through a desire to accomplish along this inevitable learning journey are we able to reflect fondly upon our childhood and realise just how much we have grown - what gentle, innocent roots still support us?
In some ways we have grown to co-exist with our tribal bonds and nurture the filial obligations we hold to our parents, as though subconsciously yearning for their presence and benevolence. The media is particularly instrumental in the new occurence of children who simply refuse to leave home or those who have left and keep only an arm’s length away - the ‘helicopter kids’.
We all remember our days in preschool as that enclave of youngsters too tender to learn the world’s lessons of repercussions, for in some ways our young adult lives are dominated by that same paradigm of sheltered practice and we are ashamed to admit to it. In truth, the true character is born out of that spirit that learns to depend upon others and lend help to their ailing and work alongside others for a collective goal. After all, if we were to consider other collectivist cultures (such as native Tibetan tribes) around the world, banding together is the only way to survive - putting together a pool of resources and support.
I suppose at its essence our anxieties about ’sharing’ are really not grounded with solid, practical implications. We are taught increasingly much so to work as individuals and to hold dreams and ambitions and goals which are solely individual - and chide ourselves for our inability to work in this function. Given the amount of time that University and work have taken from me, it is not an entirely tragic thing for the time spent away from my individual endeavours are well-spend learning about how I relate with the world and how we can work together for a better good. Workplaces exist in teams because of the need for cohesion, bands function only with all members and families are not the same without mutual respect and love.
While we might struggle with the pace and demands of the everyday life and feel that work is leading us into great anxieties about being distant from our goals, just remember that there is a time for all things and all things function in their own time. Creativity amongst many things is something which cannot be forced, only fostered.
So in the long weeks or months or even years away from your inner being, just remember that you haven’t really lost anything at all: your unique attributes and skills will always be waiting for you to foster them. It is merely a case of defining creative ways to distance ourselves from the demands of the material world — a balance is necessary to temper our individualistic desires and our need for collectivistic working. If such elements of self-initiation and group functioning were truly unimportant, why then are they the most highly valued attributes of the new graduate in the job market, and the most well-kept secret of the successful people of the world?
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